“Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. And then one fine morning— So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.” -F. Scott Fitzgerald The Great Gatsby
The idea of “the green light” has resonated within my mind since turning the musty, worn pages of The Great Gatsby in my junior year of high school. My wonderful, knowledgeable, and compassionate teacher, Mrs. Forthun, unknowingly planted a seedling in my mind that would not know real growth until my sophomore year studies at Louisiana State University.
For years F. Scott Fitzgerald’s words haunted me. Every year since high school, I went back to the first true novel I fell deeply in love with. Unknowingly I was more like the character Gatsby than I had ever imagined. I constantly chased after my “green light.” I too lived in the same notion of disillusionment that was so closely associated with the glamorous and lively 20’s. I chased lofty, unreachable goals, much like Gatsby’s chase of Daisy. We both failed at attaining our green lights miserably. Living for the past is poison to the furthering of our lives.
Re-reading The Great Gatsby, as I did at least once a year, three years ago changed my outlook on life. I realized I was living a life seemingly paralleled to Gatsby’s. I was living for an end I would never attain. My true passions stared me in the face taking the form of black ink on a worn, yellowed piece of paper. Since that moment, I knew I was destined to be a teacher. To help shape young minds, just as mine was shaped by the most influential teacher I studied with. My passion for English was obvious and that same passion became my devotion to school and my life with the loving support of my husband. Gatsby’s disillusionment followed him to his end, but I was not going to let that same end befall. My green light slowly faded into the darkness and transformed into a real hope, a real dream, and a real future.
As of now, my real future consists of the loving husband I recently vowed to love for the rest of my life.
As of now, my real future consists of the teaching position I recently took to teach 6th graders in a very low-income school in Denver, CO.
Stones have been set to line the path of my future and I could not be more excited, enthralled, and scared for what is before me. But, I hope that you will be following my steps and learning from my mistakes along the way.
Until next time,